Recently, Buffalo, New York natives Del Paxton gave New Noise Magazine some life tips on how to survive their apocalyptic winters. Florida’s own Henrietta decided that their input on how to survive in Orlando would be a necessary addition to explain their hardships. If people are unfamiliar with Henrietta, they play a style of music that includes indie rock, twinkled with some southern tinged emotional hooks. The drums roam, the bass booms and the guitars are bright with licks. Needless to say, it’s a tough winter everywhere.
Purchase Henrietta’s Paper Wings or The Trick Is Not Minding here.
1. Go outside.
Enjoy the outdoors while you can, because once it heats back up starting in February, camping is no longer a fun thing to do. First it just gets too sweaty and uncomfortable. Then the mosquitoes start coming out and you have to start worrying about getting the West Nile Virus. The winter is the only time of year it doesn’t hurt to be outside. You still need sunblock though, unless you’re one of those leathery beach people that live down here. In which case, keep being an inspiration for us all.
2. Dust off those winter clothes.
Everyone down here has some winter gear that they never get the chance to wear, so the first day of the year it gets “cold”, everyone starts busting it out. We’re all guilty of debating if we’ll look weird wearing the hoodie, beanie, jeans combo in 65 degree weather at some point in time. The answer is no, you won’t. We’ll all be doing the same thing, so gear up homie, we’re sweating through this one together.
3. Study the Snowbirds.
There are a lot of people who live up north but have houses down in Florida that they only visit during the winter so they can get away from actual cold weather. We call these people Snowbirds. Pretty much all of us in Henrietta work in the service industry, so this time of year the Snow Birds pay the bills. Know them well, learn their flight patterns, and you get that rent money lined up real quick.
4. Keep on dreaming.
When I was a kid, I thought each year was the year I’d finally see it snowing in Orlando, Florida. I didn’t care how many times I was told that it basically isn’t possible, and that even if it did, it would melt as soon as it hit the ground. Sometimes you just gotta say fuck the haters and get your snowboard ready so you can drop in on your neighbors driveway when the time is ready.
Once you grow up though, you give up that childhood bull and go to Winter themed events that blow around fake snow and pretend that you don’t live on America’s tropical penis.
5. Ride a Gator.
They’re cold blooded so they slow down a little in the winter. You might finally be able to get away with it. Just kidding though, don’t mess with gators ever. That’s dumb.
Photo by Colin Czerwinski
