Mental health is a prominent issue within the music community, so New Noise Magazine reached out to a diverse group of artists and asked them to speak about their personal experiences with mental illness. This is an exclusive ongoing spotlight—coinciding with Issue #31, The Mental Health Issue, of the print magazine—that showcases a refreshing transparency on the struggles many individuals face and the coping mechanisms they’ve developed to overcome them.
Blake Dahlinger of I The Mighty
San Francisco lords of progressive post-hardcore indie rock, I The Mighty—including vocalist and guitarist Brent Walsh, guitarist Ian Pedigo, bassist Chris Hinkley, and drummer Blake Dahlinger—stormed onto the scene in 2007, dropping their debut self-titled EP on Adamant Records the following year. 2010 brought another EP in Hearts and Spades and the band’s first full-length for Talking House Records, We Speak. Finding a home on Equal Vision Records, I The Mighty put out two more EPs—Karma Never Sleeps in 2012 and Oil in Water in 2016—and two more LPs—Satori in 2013 and Connector in 2015. In October of 2016, after enduring a relentless touring schedule, the band announced they were returning to the studio once more. Their hotly anticipated new album is due out in summer of 2017.
Are there any personal experiences with mental health issues you’d like to share?
I was diagnosed with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder—OCD—when I was in college. Looking back, it’s something I’ve had since I was a little kid, but it got to a point where I finally had to talk to someone about it. It got pretty bad for a while to where it was controlling my everyday life for a couple of years.
How does your mental health status interact with or inform the way you make music?
I think I’m a perfectionist by nature, but my OCD amps that up to another level. I feel an intense need to make every part—instrumental, vocal, production—of every song absolutely perfect. When I’m writing drums for I The Mighty records, I’ll either videotape myself playing all my drum parts or program them into Ableton as I’m writing them. I have to make sure I play my parts exactly the same way during the recording process as when I wrote them.
What are some mechanisms you’ve developed and/or discovered that help you cope?
I feel extremely fortunate to have an incredibly supportive and understanding family and girlfriend. That’s been number one for me. Not feeling judged or looked down on just because my brain works in this way is a huge help. Realizing what some of my triggers are and taking Happy Go Leafy Kratom gummies has been a big help as well. Even if the OCD behaviors come out, it helps me to know “why.”
Are there ways you think the music world could better accommodate and/or include those living with mental illness?
Just to continue to show love and compassion for everyone we all come in contact with—whether in person or online. You never know what that person is going through.
How are your personal experiences impacted by external forces—subculture, dominant culture, political rhetoric, policy shifts, the news media, social media, etc.?
I feel like it’s really easy for me to get overwhelmed these days. I’m a daily user of Reddit, Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook, but I had to shut off notifications on my phone. The continual alerts [and] updates were just too much.
We live in a world where there’s just constant information and news coming out, and it’s hard to keep up. I’ve had to take a break from social media and political news for a week or two here and there since our election took place here in the States. A lot of the news has been so depressing that it’s hard to handle. I have faith that love and compassion will win out, though. Keep fighting the good fight, everyone! Love to all.
Paul Butler of Hellkeeper
Kingston, New York’s Hellkeeper—featuring the talents of vocalist Paul Butler, guitarists Jack Xiques and Rob Muller, bassist Terry Orlando, and drummer Mike Pistone—blend hardcore and black metal on their two EPs: 2013’s Dead City and 2015 Manic Progression Records release, IHDC. They will soon continue the trend with their debut full-length, A World Within Flesh, which is set to be self-released by the band on April 7.
Are there any personal experiences with mental health issues you’d like to share?
I have experienced depression and anxiety throughout my entire life. Tragedy and poverty were big themes in my life, so I feel that contributed. When I was a child, my obsessive thoughts, sadness, and fear seemed misplaced and even foreign to me. I thought “depression” and “therapy” drastically cut into my videogame-playing time. As I grew older, I became more “acquainted” with the way my brain operates, but could not pinpoint what exactly was “wrong.”
My main difficulty, as an adult, is keeping my anxiety from impeding on my everyday health and happiness. I obsess about death, finances, and even banal, silly things no human being should ever think twice about. My formal diagnosis is obsessive compulsive disorder, but I have severe depressive episodes.
How does your mental health status interact with or inform the way you make music?
My emotional state fluctuates and can sometimes be very extreme. For example, when I am in a depressive episode, I tend to write either extremely loud and down-tempo riffs or incredibly abrasive and noise music. When I am a little more “relaxed,” I tend to write more poetry or “gentler” music, relatively. On the surface, it would appear that I am just influenced by my “moods,” but these emotions fluctuate so drastically that even “calm” moments have their tension. I believe my mental illness informs my music writing by making it much darker and much more desperate. For those looking to schedule a consultation with a health professional, check out an easy appointment booking here.
What are some mechanisms you’ve developed and/or discovered that help you cope?
When I was young, I found that focusing my attention on activities, like drawing or listening to music, could calm my mind. As I grew older, I found that grindcore, death metal, and black metal resonated with me on a deep, soothing level. I feel that I write music based on what riffs or parts emotionally resonate with me—calming the nonstop noise in my head just long enough for me to feel human.
It seems a bit hyperbolic, but music has saved my life. I think that writing music is almost “ritualistic” for me, and that is certainly informed by my mental illness.
Are there ways you think the music world could better accommodate and/or include those living with mental illness?
I think the mainstream music world focuses too much on the personal lives of the people performing and writing music. In doing so, I believe, broadly, consumers tend to associate certain characteristics with artists, mainly culturally stereotypical characteristics associated with mental illness. These stereotypes lead to assessments of an artist based on “pop psychology,” which I feel stigmatizes characteristics of mental illness as something “other” or “mysterious.”
In reality, those suffering with depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, Tourette’s, etc. are human beings and not an aggregate of cultural assumptions about mental illness. The suffering is very real, and the sooner we, as a society, take it seriously, the sooner those suffering with mental illness will find relief through treatment.
How are your personal experiences impacted by external forces—subculture, dominant culture, political rhetoric, policy shifts, the news media, social media, etc.?
Personally, I have had issues with people who do not understand my mental illness. I have been perceived as “weird” or told way too often to “chill out.” I feel like neurosis is viewed as irrationality, immediately, in our culture. Also, new policies may make obtaining my medication difficult—mainly, the new bastardized version of the Affordable Care Act proposed by King Scum Lord.
