New Noise Magazine reached out to a diverse group of artists and asked them to speak about their personal experiences with dealing with their overall wellness. The topic of being in good physical and mental is an exclusive spotlight coinciding with Issue #32 of the print magazine, deemed The Wellness Issue. Each artist speaks with a refreshing transparency on the struggles they face and how to better go about their own health.
Featuring Raul Panther III of Protomen
Nashville-based octet, Protomen, turn concept into high art with a sound that possesses all the fury of the most bombastic hard rock hits of the ‘80s and all the theatricality of the most over-the-top ‘70s prog. The band hit the road throughout early to mid 2017 in support of their short film, “Light Up the Night.” According to the filmmakers, the short “is set in an Orwellian, futuristic 1980s. The story tells of the tensions flaring between rebellious citizens and robotic law enforcement.”
On Vocal Health:
People ask me all the time how I’m able to pull off singing our brand of high-flying rock ‘n’ roll night after night on the road. I tell them the trick is that I’m a super boring person offstage. Which is true. I sleep—as much as one can on tour. I drink plenty of water—and steer clear of my favorite whiskey. I avoid truck stop fast food—as much as one can on tour. I don’t smoke—anything. I try not to make out with people who are sick—as much as one can on tour. And then, there are a couple of other tricks and rituals that I do, because I’ve tried everything and this is what works for me.
For me, it’s all about the warm-up. I walk away from whatever else I’m doing about an hour before I have to hit my first note and start down my pre-show checklist:
Steam
I usually spend about 10 to 15 minutes with my head over a steaming tea kettle of water. It opens up your throat and keeps everything hydrated.
Gaia Throat Shield and Thayers Slippery Elm
These are a couple of products that I tell everyone about, because they’ve worked well for me. The first is a spray that I’ve found keeps swelling of the vocal chords to a minimum and helps lubricate and cut down the gross road gunk that gets stuck in your throat and chest. The second is a lozenge that also helps with irritation and inflammation of the vocal chords. I use both before and after the show—every time.
Warming Up Everything
For me, warming up your body is just as important as warming up your voice. I usually stretch and do vocal warm-ups for about 30 to 45 minutes before the show.
Entertainer’s Secret Throat Spray
This is the best thing I’ve found to use during a set, along with lots of water. It’s an aloe-based spray that keeps things lubricated and doesn’t numb anything.
The other thing I’ve had to come to terms with over the last 15 years is the fact that your voice and your health are more important than any one show. I’ve tried some dumb things in my singing career to make sure we didn’t have to cancel. In desperation, I’ve swallowed every homeopathic herb and quick-fix chemical remedy out there. And I’ve played through some pretty fierce illnesses. I once had an EMT on standby backstage, because I decided I could play through Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever. I made it. But the point is: that was super dumb. Sometimes, you just can’t sing. But you know what’s pretty rad? When your band plays the set anyway and leads a whole rowdy crowd in a full-set singalong—and then, you don’t die. That’s pretty rad, right?
Featuring Lord Bendover of The Upper Crust
After beginning as a joke in 1994, Boston’s The Upper Crust picked up speed, finding their way onto everything from late-night talk shows to giant festival stages. After releasing five studio albums, the colorful cast of bewigged characters—including vocalist and guitarist Lord Bendover, bassist Count Bassie, guitarist The Duc D’istortion, and drummer Jackie Kickassis—have returned to put the serfs back in their place with a new full-length, Delusions of Grandeur, which they self-released back in April.
Lord Bendover’s Guide To Wellness on the Road:
Five Tips from Nearly Three Centuries of Touring With The Upper Crust
(Why five? Who knows? Market research has shown other figures more attractive to the reading audience. Perhaps His Lordship simply wandered off and became distracted. Or perhaps he became distracted and then subsequently wandered off—though the simplest explanation is that he never learned how to count on two hands at once, being compelled to use the one to count upon the other, and so, five was as good as it was going to get.)
When The Upper Crust—the world’s premier 18th century rocque ensemble—climb into our motorized carriage and embark upon the road, our every wish and appetite must be sated immediately and in full—ideally, without having to express it and, most ideally of all, before it has even been conceived. And so it should be with you and your touring band.
To achieve this state of perfect ease and equanimity upon the road, we cannot overemphasize the importance of a qualified retinue of attendants—though good help, it has often been observed, is harder and harder to find these days.
That is why the first thing you must do when touring with your band is to retain at least a dozen liveried servants, footmen, coachmen, and all-purpose lackeys of the most dependable and industrious type.
Secondly, you must ensure that your diet is indisputably optimum. This can be done by consulting that indispensable article of life upon the road, the Michelin Guide. When you arrive at your destination each day, look up the finest multi-star restaurant nearby, tip the maître d’ handsomely, and permit him to seat you at the best table in the house. Simply ordering the most expensive items on the menu will ensure your dining satisfaction.
Thirdly, let us address the topic of personal hygiene. You are all probably familiar with the difficulty attendant upon bathing when there are several of you and limited time and facilities. That is why we save time and trouble by the simple expedient of dumping a bottle of French perfume over our heads. Problem solved.
Fourthly, it is well known that other appetites must often be satisfied on the road—yet, we must caution you against the indulgence of libidinous exigencies without proper precautions, for Cupid’s arrows smite the unwary at the most inopportune times and places. A box of sheepskin condoms can be depended upon to stave off the less pleasurable consequences of ill-considered congress.
Fifthly and lastly, we turn to the subject of sleep. It is essential that you find opportunities to rest in the interstices between travel, soundcheck, dining, making love to a seemingly endless parade of attractive strangers, and, of course, performing. This may best be accomplished by traveling in your own private aeroplane and relaxing upon arrival in a suitable five-star hotel, whilst the lackeys do the hard work necessary for the show to go on.
The accumulated wisdom of nearly three centuries of touring can hardly be distilled into such a brief missive, but we trust that you have found at least some of this information pertinent to your health and happiness upon the road.
We remain, with the Greatest Affectation,
Lord Bendover
The Upper Crust
Featuring Dylan Villain of The Wild!
British Columbia-based rock ‘n’ roll band The Wild!’s debut EP, GxDxWxB—which stands for God Damn Wild Boys—was released via eOne Music Canada back in 2015. Their music fuses the swampy texture of Delta blues with punk rock attitude, and vocalist Dylan Villain describes their sound as “a mixture of what the blues feels like, rock ‘n’ roll sounds like, and punk rock smells like.” Their new album, Wild At Heart—which dropped back in February, also through eOne—was produced by Mike Fraser, who has worked with the likes of AC/DC, Aerosmith, Jimmy Page, and Van Halen.
Finding Balance on the Road
Cocaine, whiskey, cigarettes, and pizza, right? Let’s face it: we all have our vices. Whether it’s drugs, booze, sex, sugar, fast food, or social media—yes, I’m talking to you with the data overages and 100 pointless updates per day—many of us partake in something a little too much for selfish reasons, which we think we deserve or has simply become habitual over the years.
However, folks, at the risk of sounding like a complete cliché-spouting dickhead, I’m here to tell you that it’s all about balance. The real secret to all this is to figure out what works for you. After all, we’re all different, but it’s important to know how to take care of yourself while you’re on the road.
The road. Let’s break that down for a minute from the perspective of a band still building their career and rollin’ in a van.
One thing that’s always gonna be challenging, whether you’re in a bus or a van, is sleep. Your sleep patterns and schedules are likely gonna be fucked. Get used to it. I’m gonna give you an average of four to five hours per night. Not bad, right? Cool. Stretch that out over a month. How’s two months feelin’? Three months? Consider yourself living this way at 15. Now, at 20. At 30. At 40? Still rollin’, eh? Fuck yeah, dude!
All right, so your day looks something like this: you clock approximately four hours of sleep. Perhaps you’re just finishing a drive shift in the van. You head straight to radio where you’re expected to be “on” for anywhere from 30 minutes to an hour by the time you’re done kissing ass or getting your ass kissed. Picture, picture, “See ya at the show tonight!” Not bad, right?
At this point, it’s straight to the venue for load-in and soundcheck, where you’re greeted by another interviewer who’s waiting for you—or who hasn’t shown up yet, but is about to right when you’re about to soundcheck. “If you could just do this quick, it won’t take more than five minutes.” Twenty minutes later: perfect, picture, picture, “Thanks, man! See you at the show!”
At this point, you think to yourself, “Maybe I should eat something?” but instead, you crush another cup of coffee or water only to realize you haven’t checked into your hotel yet. You head to the hotel. Get into your rooms. Shower if you have time, change, and head straight back to the venue. Maybe at this point you’ve eaten something quick that you could just grab and go on the way. Regardless, this is likely your first meal of the day. Sometimes, your last.
You get to the venue, head to merch with your merch guy, and hang with fans for a bit: picture, picture, picture, “All right, see you guys in a bit!” By this time, I’m gonna say you’ve been up for about 12 hours, running on four hours sleep with approximately one meal in your gut. Not to mention the mental exhaustion you’re feelin’ behind the scenes from being “on” all the time and never really alone to mentally shut down for bit and just chill.
Anyway, let’s get back to your day. You get onstage for 45 minutes to an hour and give it fuckin’ everything you got, man. Your body and mind are thrashed, but it was totally worth it. You quickly get your gear offstage in 15 minutes and then head back to merch to hang with the fans again. You’re there for a good long while, signing autographs and taking more pictures in between changeovers of the other bands until you get your final rush of fans after the headliner finishes.
At this point, it’s anywhere from 1 to 2 a.m.
Sometimes, you’ve been unable to load your gear into your trailer after your set, and it’s all stacked in a nearby hallway, so it’s time to tackle that and leave the venue. You should probably eat something, hey? Pizza or burgers and fries en route to your hotel are the only thing that’s open at this point. You get to your hotel, where you realize you have a hard time winding down to sleep, so you stay up on your phone or bullshit with the fellas for a while. Sleep about four hours, wake up, and do it all over again.
All right. Let’s look at all that for a minute. You slept four hours. You were awake and mentally and physically hard on your body for about 19 hours. You ate twice. Maybe you got drunk. Maybe you got high. Regardless, these are still some fairly alarming numbers when stretched out over long periods of time—sober or not. Crazy, right?!
Now, I wanna make one thing clear here. I am not complaining in any way, shape, or form. I fucking love this shit, and I was built for it. In fact, that’s one thing I’m most proud of, being one of the few who’s able to withstand this lifestyle. I’m gonna be honest: it ain’t for all of you. I’m no doctor, and, as I mentioned earlier, it’s important to know what works for you personally when dealing with these challenges.
At any rate, here are a few tips to help you navigate an already fucked up ship on the choppy waters of rock ‘n’ roll.
Let’s start with sleep. Sleep is the fuckin’ key. If you can’t get more than four to five hours a night, then it’s all about naps. If you can’t nap like I couldn’t when I was younger, you’re gonna have to learn to like I did. Clock a couple 10 to 20 minuters here and there, and you’ll be amazed at how this helps your energy level and mood throughout that long-ass day you’re livin’.
Next up is hydration—also key. Whether you’re a singer or not, drink a shitload of water. If you don’t and have some bullshit excuse as to why you think you can’t, drop it and start drinking more water. I drink anywhere from four to six liters every day, but I’m a psycho about maintaining my voice on and off the road. Start with two liters per day, and tell me you don’t feel a difference. Allowing yourself enough water in a day to stay properly hydrated helps with energy levels and is just generally all-around good for you. It’s water, dude! Figure it out…
All right, what’s next here? Food! Food is such a crucial part of everyday life, whether you’re on tour or not. What I’ve found works for me is eating fruit in the mornings while drinking a shitload of water. I then take a spoonful of Manuka honey straight to the dome, followed by honey and lemon mixed in hot water. I buy honey and lemons from the grocery store and keep them in the van. Every gas station has hot water—boom, dialed. That’s my morning. For lunch, I usually eat somethin’ with chicken that fills me up. If there’s no stopping for lunch, wraps in the van are key, but we’ll get to that in a minute. For dinner, I try to stick to a salad. Yep, a fucking salad, dude. Get over it! Nobody wants to eat a huge meal and then go run around onstage for an hour all bloated and shit. Also, nobody wants to see you do that either! I’m not gonna sit here and pretend like I don’t crush pizza, burgers, tacos, and wings on tour, ‘cause I do—like a champ. But again, it’s all about balance. You simply can’t eat like shit every day. If you do, you’ll start to feel like shit every day. So, know about that, and pick your battles, man.
Things you should be doing: grab some fruit from the grocery store, cases of water, wraps, deli meat, mayo, and lettuce or spinach. Whoever isn’t driving should make wraps while in the van. You’ll save yourself money and time, being that you have to stop a lot less along the way. And your body will thank you. You’re welcome. Also, eat vegetables. The green ones. Veggie trays for the van are a good idea. Again, less time wasted stopping. More health. That’s a win.
What you eat on show days should be different than what you eat on days off. The same can be said about partying. For me, I’ve learned that I really can’t party when on the road like I used to.
It’s not that I don’t—but unless I have consecutive days off to recoup from a good night out with the boys, I don’t do it. Think about it. You’re already against the grain, eating like shit and getting little to no sleep. Now you’re gonna rage super hard and endure that fucked up daily schedule the next day? One time? OK. Twice? Sure. Three days in a row? Maybe. But this shit adds up over time and eventually takes its toll on you. Again, it’s about that balance and picking your battles, man! Sometimes, it’s fun to save it all for the last night of the tour when you know you’ve got at least a week off coming up and make it a real good one, ya know? Earn that shit. So, be smart out there.
Last, but not least: cell phones. I’m gonna admit, I struggle with this one, but hey, nobody’s perfect. If you’re someone who ends up staring at your phone for hours on end when you can’t sleep—or simply out of sheer boredom during those long-ass drives—you’re gonna have to learn to put your phone down for a minute, bud. It’s simple. This life is mentally exhausting—just as much, if not more, than it is physically. Your mind needs a break from it all just as much as your body does. Straight up.
Anyway, those are just a few of the things that I’ve found work for me on the road. Again, I can’t stress enough that it’s all about balance and figuring out what works best for you. After you’ve got that sorted out, just be about it and stick to it.
And hey, if you’re one of those people who’s able to eat like shit, not sleep, party super hard, and still give your fans a killer show night after night, then ride on, you crazy fuckin’ mutant! I’ll see you on my days off!
Featuring Collin Walsh of Grayscale
Philadelphia-based quintet, Grayscale—comprised of vocalist Collin Walsh, guitarist and vocalist Dallas Molster, guitarist Andrew Kyne, bassist Nick Ventimiglia, and drummer Nick Veno—are one of the latest bands to emerge from the most fertile punk scene currently going. Their debut album, Adornment, was produced by Kyle Black (State Champs, Handguns, Hit The Lights) and released via Fearless Records on May 5.
Using Stream Of Consciousness To Process Feelings
My name is Collin Walsh, I am 23 years old, and live in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. Like many young people today, I come from a broken family, both nuclear and extended. In addition to my family problems, I grew up an environment where I was never comfortable talking about feelings. I was raised to “deal” with what upset me, not to discuss it. I became accustomed to keeping my feelings bottled up, which has led to a lot of anxiety and lack of sleep throughout my life.
Stream of consciousness is a narrative tool that attempts to give the written equivalent of someone’s thought processes, either in a loose interior monologue or in connection to their actions. Stream of consciousness writing is regarded as a special form of interior monologue and is characterized by leaps in thought and lack of some or all punctuation.
I was first introduced to this technique by my high school English teacher, Mrs. Hohman. Every Friday morning, we would have a “Friday free-write” session, in which one student a week would choose a song for the class to listen to. While we listened, we would write down anything and everything that came to mind on paper. Being the arrogant 16-year-old I was, it felt like a waste of time to me in the beginning. However, I very quickly began to enjoy it and look forward to it every Friday. It felt good to dump every word and thought onto paper; it was cleansing for me. I had always enjoyed writing poetry and stories before high school, but learning and practicing this narrative mode weekly was a huge contributor to what has become my lyric-writing process now. I became sort of addicted to the naturally cleansing feeling it gave me.
Although I would write prior to this practice, it never was a pure unloading of my feelings. It took me quite a bit of focus and practice to be able to truly follow my brain and scribe everything onto paper. I write lyrics very often now. If you could see my lyric book, you’d think it belonged to someone who has lost their mind. There are all kinds if quick excerpts, outbursts, sketches, and long, detailed stories found among one another—sometimes crammed on the same page.
I’ve learned and am still learning a lot about myself and the way I actually feel about things I’ve been through. I have learned how much some things have truly affected me. Through this practice, I am able to translate first-person stories and create fictional ones as well, making myself a character in the plot and romanticizing the environment in which my struggles occur. A lot of Adornment is based off of real scenarios that are placed into story-like environments.
Writing has been my coping mechanism for many years. It has helped curb my anxiety and insomnia to this day. If I go a long period without writing, I feel like I am going to explode. Since I started stream of consciousness specifically, I’ve been able to deal with some of my issues much easier. Maybe it is something that comes with age? I’m not entirely sure. Regardless, sometimes it takes a while to open up to people about things that need to be talked about. Until you feel comfortable and ready, it is crucial to find ways that help put you at ease. It’s different for every person, but important for everybody.
By no means am I an expert; I still carry plenty of guilt and have unaddressed problems that I struggle with every day. There is still a long way to go for me. That being said, my advice is to try stream of consciousness. Go put on music in your room, lock the door, and just write. Get out as much as you can for as long as you feel is needed. Do this as often as you want, and see if it helps—but don’t bottle up your emotions like I did.
