There’s a parallel narrative running throughout Softcult’s debut record When A Flower Doesn’t Grow, the first being perseverance in the face of internal adversity and the other being a physical rebellion to systemic oppression. After the dissolution of their previous band Courage My Love, Softcult’s experiences within the alternative scene led to a distinct personality split that resembled this dual narrative. Softcult on stage are a brash feminine duo encapsulating the rebellious riot grrrl ethos; off-stage, they possess a personality in direct opposition to that message. “I had internalized so much oppression, abuse, sexism, misogyny, and shame while still preaching empowerment in my lyrics. The person I portrayed myself to be on stage was not the same person making the decisions that governed my life,” Softcult’s Mercedes Arn-Horn says in a statement.
On their debut record, Softcult (twin sister duo Mercedes and Phoenix Arn-Horn) manages to balance tender feminine authenticity with hardened resistance to patriarchal violence. Over the course of five years, the band attempted to balance the two in the form of EPs and zines. Yet it was the end of Mercedes’ nine-year relationship—alongside her newfound life as an out-of-the-closet queer person—that propelled the duo into a period of personal upheaval. When A Flower Doesn’t Grow is Softcult attempting to collect these scattered pieces and construct a new life rooted in an optimism they had previously considered naive.
When A Flower Doesn’t Grow is a new chapter for the band, one that refuses to conform to the rising apathy caused by our current social and political climate. Opener “Pill To Swallow” channels this through a flurry of snare hits and their signature delayed guitars. “Down at the bottom/It’s a hard pill to swallow,” Mercedes pleads, until the finale slows the track with a haunting final chord. “Not Sorry” is a drowned-out grunge anthem that releases pent up frustrations with unrelenting aggression. In “I Held You Like Glass,” an acoustic guitar lays the foundation as Mercedes’ feather-like vocals describe the process of healing internalized trauma. “It hurt for a while/And then it went numb/A strange kind of comfort,” she laments before belting into a violent chorus. It’s here where the message is clear: It takes work to heal from your traumas, but in the end, it’s worth it.
One look at Softcult’s performances tells you exactly what you need to know. Their unfiltered politics seeps into every aspect of their image and sound. Tracks like “16/25” and “She Said, He Said” exert a female rage so common that it almost goes without saying. The former discusses men’s constant predation towards younger women. “She doesn’t know how to drive/She’s 16, you’re 25,” Mercedes belts on top of trashing guitars and pounding drum fills. The latter captures the frustrations that victims of assault often feel. A thumping bass line and pulsating bass kick play in unison as angular guitars slowly take over the track. But it’s “Tired” where Softcult reach their breaking point. The duo immediately plunge into a sea of distorted guitars and syncopated bass kicks as they list everything that exhausts them. Even when only granted a minute, Mercedes is able to scream so viscerally as to leave the lyric “I’m tired!” ringing in one’s ear even after the track has ended.
Softcult understands how to blend these two attitudes, even when, at times, the state of the world weighs on them immensely. “It’s a man’s world/You can’t live in it for free/You’ve got some nerve asking for autonomy,” Mercedes declares on “Queen Of Nothing.” Title track “When A Flower Doesn’t Grow” is a soft ballad that questions the conditions that prevents one from achieving. “When a flower doesn’t grow/Do we blame the dying rose/Or the soil that it called home,” Softcult asks. It’s through the duo’s shared experiences, their uncompromising politics, and their DIY-ethos that they’re able to reinvigorate a sense of accountability in a post-#MeToo world—an era bogged down by a rise in regressive politics and harmful ideologies. It’s the ability to remain optimistic when the world keeps falling apart. When the social parameters of how to be feminine keeps becoming more unrealistic. In other words, When A Flower Doesn’t Grow is Softcult’s manifesto for radical feminine optimism.
When A Flower Doesn’t Grow is out January 30 via Easy Life Records.
